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luciabI've been working on my take-home final for Public Libraries. I left the first question till last, because I knew it was going to be hardest for me. Sure enough, it is. It is, in fact, very similar in both tone and substance to the required term paper, known herein as That Damned Paper. Both are all about ideals. I don't think I believe in ideals any more. I lived through the sixties, after all, and saw what became of the ideals and us.
Once I got to musing on the topic, I realized again that I believe in what might be called the Pendulum Theory of History. I have no idea if such a thing existed before I said that; you know that I hate both theory and the general study of history, so I sure wouldn't be the person to know. Anyway, you can probably deduce what that theory comprises. Every time I contemplate this, I also ponder on the fact that a pendulum slows down and its arc becomes a little shorter every swing, so theoretically it should settle down in the middle somewhere, some time. Except I see that pendulum as being part of a larger pedulum, I think. Or maybe it's that when things start to wind down, something happens to upset the applecart, as it were. (Hey, I can mix metaphors with the best of 'em.) The whole damned pendulum might get shoved to the right or the left a few feet, but the process continues.
It's really hard for me to see real progress in teeny little incremental changes. It might change eventually, but it doesn't feel like it'll be in my lifetime. Back in the day, (says the old granny with a quaver in her voice) when people were burning bras and such, there were those who were most unhappy with the bra burners, asking, did they really think that was going to change anything? It just looked like women were crazy! My feeling then was that well, that "lunatic fringe" (even if I didn't particularly think they were loony) made smaller demands seem so much more reasonable that they had a better chance of success.
I had to remind myself of that theory when the whole gay marriage issue erupted. My first response was anger-- it was too soon! Gays were making some progress and this is just too soon! I don't know if it's going to work, the part about making smaller demands seem more reasonable. Is it working? Are gays making political progress? Is it at a greater rate than before the marriage issue arose? I can't tell.
I do know that Blacks still have not achieved full equality, forty years later. I am sure, however, that they've made more progress than they would have made if they hadn't marched and made themselves known. The people who have the power are not going to magically wake up one morning and say "Well, damn! Look at all those people who don't have all the privileges I do! Why didn't I notice that before? I think we'll just have to change that!" and go change the laws and attitudes instantly.
All this has wandered far afield from my opening 'graf, I know, and I'm not as good as Garrison Keillor at making it come back around so slick you won't even notice what's happening until it's all over and the whole thing is tied up with a neat little bow on top. (Whew.)
Anyway, what prompted all this is a question about what the public library can do to make a positive change in the world, basically. The question is based on a liberal foundation of little changes, despite the teacher's admonitions to be creative! and be imaginative! Despite all the best intentions of my teachers, I still have a strong suspicion that the people who already use the library will continue to do so, and those who don't, won't. We can talk about "cultural awareness" all day, and buy books in dozens of languages, but people who don't know they're there won't use them.
Maybe I've just gotten too old while I wasn't looking. I don't have much faith in ooey-gooey liberalism, but I don't think radicalism is going to work in this country right now, either. (I started to say right-wing radicalism seems to be working, but actually, it seems to be slipping a bit, too. Heh! Well, THAT was a little burst of feel-better!)
I think this is the gist of why I am hating this exam question and That Damned Paper so bad-- I feel like it's all just mooshy feel-good stuff that won't make any difference. It pisses me off and makes me feel bleak, in equal parts. No wonder I'm hating it.
Once I got to musing on the topic, I realized again that I believe in what might be called the Pendulum Theory of History. I have no idea if such a thing existed before I said that; you know that I hate both theory and the general study of history, so I sure wouldn't be the person to know. Anyway, you can probably deduce what that theory comprises. Every time I contemplate this, I also ponder on the fact that a pendulum slows down and its arc becomes a little shorter every swing, so theoretically it should settle down in the middle somewhere, some time. Except I see that pendulum as being part of a larger pedulum, I think. Or maybe it's that when things start to wind down, something happens to upset the applecart, as it were. (Hey, I can mix metaphors with the best of 'em.) The whole damned pendulum might get shoved to the right or the left a few feet, but the process continues.
It's really hard for me to see real progress in teeny little incremental changes. It might change eventually, but it doesn't feel like it'll be in my lifetime. Back in the day, (says the old granny with a quaver in her voice) when people were burning bras and such, there were those who were most unhappy with the bra burners, asking, did they really think that was going to change anything? It just looked like women were crazy! My feeling then was that well, that "lunatic fringe" (even if I didn't particularly think they were loony) made smaller demands seem so much more reasonable that they had a better chance of success.
I had to remind myself of that theory when the whole gay marriage issue erupted. My first response was anger-- it was too soon! Gays were making some progress and this is just too soon! I don't know if it's going to work, the part about making smaller demands seem more reasonable. Is it working? Are gays making political progress? Is it at a greater rate than before the marriage issue arose? I can't tell.
I do know that Blacks still have not achieved full equality, forty years later. I am sure, however, that they've made more progress than they would have made if they hadn't marched and made themselves known. The people who have the power are not going to magically wake up one morning and say "Well, damn! Look at all those people who don't have all the privileges I do! Why didn't I notice that before? I think we'll just have to change that!" and go change the laws and attitudes instantly.
All this has wandered far afield from my opening 'graf, I know, and I'm not as good as Garrison Keillor at making it come back around so slick you won't even notice what's happening until it's all over and the whole thing is tied up with a neat little bow on top. (Whew.)
Anyway, what prompted all this is a question about what the public library can do to make a positive change in the world, basically. The question is based on a liberal foundation of little changes, despite the teacher's admonitions to be creative! and be imaginative! Despite all the best intentions of my teachers, I still have a strong suspicion that the people who already use the library will continue to do so, and those who don't, won't. We can talk about "cultural awareness" all day, and buy books in dozens of languages, but people who don't know they're there won't use them.
Maybe I've just gotten too old while I wasn't looking. I don't have much faith in ooey-gooey liberalism, but I don't think radicalism is going to work in this country right now, either. (I started to say right-wing radicalism seems to be working, but actually, it seems to be slipping a bit, too. Heh! Well, THAT was a little burst of feel-better!)
I think this is the gist of why I am hating this exam question and That Damned Paper so bad-- I feel like it's all just mooshy feel-good stuff that won't make any difference. It pisses me off and makes me feel bleak, in equal parts. No wonder I'm hating it.
