luciab: (Default)
Interesting dream this morning, in a revealing sort of way. I had been to each of my classes once (which is true) but had also made a commitment to do set of architectural drawings for someone, on a freelance basis. I was in another architect's office; he was a local guy but seemed to be some sort of big name. (He was wearing a mango-colored slub-silk suit with "Elmore Leonard" embroidered across the left front, slightly above the waist, in letters about an inch and a half high. Pretty funny if you know Elmore Leonard's books.) We seemed to be fairly friendly and I was asking him for advice. I had it in my head that I would do just the "big picture" kind of drawings-- plans, elevations and sections, no construction stuff, no details. Instead he started listing all the details I'd need to include, drywall among them. (One day last week I watched a drywall detail guy spend over half an hour on a detail that no one will ever notice, and which is at least 10' above the floor. I was very impressed with his dedication.) I remember thinking that maybe he'd be supportive and help talk me through the rough spots; I was sure I had the knowledge to do the work. Maybe I'd even do so well that I'd stay in architecture instead of becoming a librarian.

Given that the architects I've worked for generally are NOT supportive about something like that (instead of ridiculing me because I didn't know something, or didn't draw it the way they would have,) I'm thinking this is a clear case of the devil you know being better than the one you don't. The other thing that's interesting is that I was doing the work freelance. If you recall, I spent several months last winter agonizing over whether to try to start a business before realizing that would be a terrible mistake. I'm not good at shmoozing, I'm not good at financial stuff. If all I had to do was the art part, and someone else handled drumming up the work and minding the business part, I'd be right there. I must be really anxious about school if I was having positive thoughts about that.

Anyway, I think the dream was worth it just to see that mango-yellow suit with "Elmore Leonard" embroidered across the front. Insert giggle here.

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luciab: (Default)
Susan Arthur

February 2011

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